It seems Singaporeans are not quite done with picking on our men in uniform. In a letter published on All Singapore Stuff recently, contributor Elaine ranted about the recurring massive jams around the White Sands area on Friday nights. Blaming parents who drive and park around to pick up their sons from army, she wants “these parents and army boys to know what kind of confusion and delays they have caused”, and that they “are enjoying their conveniences at the expense of other innocent motorists!” Airing grievances such as having to “get stuck for at least 15 minutes to get out of that place,” she calls for MINDEF to take action. She then reproaches the parents for “pampering their boys whom are serving their NS”, even making remarks like “Are these boys paralysed? Or need to be spoon fed?” and “So these army boys are what? VIPs?” Perhaps this is what she expects from all of us:

Constant Public Scrutiny

Thanks to ‘Stomp culture’, our poor NSFs have gotten their unfair share of being slammed and ridiculed for the most ludicrous reasons. How many times have you seen reports calling out soldiers for taking up seats on public transport? Our soldiers deserve a seat as much as we do. There is no law stating that they cannot take up a seat on the train, and yet it's not rare for them to be shamed for doing just that. Like in this report, where the writer so conveniently crops the empty seat out of the photo, making the NSF look inconsiderate for not giving up his seat to an elderly woman.

Or this lady commuter, who is so affected by the “air pollution” from NSFs who book out every Friday.

The Adverse Effect Is Real

These young men go through grueling weeks in camp serving the nation, and when they're out, they have to put up with such criticism. Because of the constant public scrutiny, the fear of public condemnation among NSFs is real. A post on SAF Confessions tells of how two recruits were standing hesitantly, unsure of whether or not to sit, even though the train was empty.

Evidently, they are not the only ones. This photo shared by Facebook user Teguh Budiman, is captioned “Sad what public media has done isn’t it.”

This social experiment by The Hidden Good is another good example of how uncomfortable our NS men are when in the public eye. Even when a seat was put up just for them, no one took a seat. Sad, isn’t it?

Going Beyond Military Duties

The NSFs in our country have done plenty of good and we thought it would be good to shine a light on their service to the nation, even when off-duty.

Like this soldier, who walked hand-in-hand with an elderly man as he went to purchase a tooth brush. It is especially heartwarming as it was a random stranger who grabbed onto his arm out of the blue.

Kudos to these men for their acts of kindness too: Noticing Madam Loh Ngiuk Lan with her wheelchair-bound mother-in-law, this group of RSAF soldiers physically carried the wheelchair-bound elderly up the stairs because the lift wasn’t working. These soldiers, who weren't in uniform, even offered to return to carry Mdm Loh’s mother-in-law down the stairs again when they were done.

This group of off-duty SAF medics spotted an elderly woman with a bandaged head and immediately stepped forward, using their professional skills to help her.

There was also this kind NSF soldier who found a wallet and went all the way to the owner's home to return it to her.

And this sweet lieutenant, Tee Chze Hao, who helped carry a little girl as her mother's hands were full with things and their destination was quite a distance away.

Give Them A Break

The next time you go off on a tirade about these NSFs, spare a thought for them. Stop snapping and shaming. While it may seem like nothing, such hurtful remarks can have a big impact on the countless men who toil to protect us. Give them a break, and more importantly, give them the respect they deserve. Also read 10 Brutal Punishments We Suffered As Kids – As Told By Singaporeans

Many of us are guilty of taking the best things we have for granted--like the love of our mothers. The ones who cleaned up our poop-laden diapers; the ones who were more worried about our PSLEs than we ourselves were; the ones who nag at us tirelessly because of love. If you think about it, the sheer number of sacrifices our mums have made for us is incredible. There are so many things our mums have done for us that perhaps, no one else ever will. This Mother's Day, we called for Singaporean millennials to share what they appreciate most about their mums. Of the hundreds of heartfelt entries, here are 14 deeply heartwarming stories that truly epitomize the deep, unconditional love of our mothers. * Stories have been edited for brevity and clarity.

1. “She held on till she knew I was in good hands, before she passed on”

I lost my mum in January. She is the strongest woman I've ever known. She spent her last 18 years on kidney dialysis, went through several surgeries and I can't even count the number of times I almost lost her at the hospital. She gave my siblings and I the best she could, despite the fact that we were very poor since young--giving her best not in terms of material riches but in her love and care. She is my mentor and my lighthouse. The doctor said she would pass away in January this year, but she held on to life just so she could come back home in an ambulance to witness my boyfriend's proposal to me. She passed peacefully the day after and I know she had been waiting for that moment, to know that I will have my other half to take care of me. My mom will always be in my heart. – Lim Edna

2. “She splurged on an apple for me when she managed to earn a little more”

She was a strict mum who brought up 10 children. The most memorable incident was the day she managed to make a little bit more cash from her sewing jobs and bought me an apple. She said to me, “Tin, make sure you finish the whole apple, don't waste." She even polished off the balance when I couldn’t finish the whole apple, saying to me that we “must treasure every single food we have.” My mum passed away three years ago at the age of 92. Till today, I still miss her a lot. – Susan Chua

3. “She surprised me in hall just to have dinner with me”

During my finals period, I stayed in hall for 3 weeks straight just to prepare for my examinations. I was feeling super stressed out not because I didn't study, but because I had anxiety. My mum surprised me when she came down all the way to Boon Lay on a weekend night just to visit and eat dinner with me because she missed me! I felt super touched because I missed her as much as she missed me. I was so glad to be able to catch up with her over dinner. She reminded me not to over-stress my mind and body, and also to drink lots of water to stay hydrated and healthy. I felt like I was the luckiest daughter on earth because that meet up definitely made me feel so much better. – XinYun Peh

4. “When I was heartbroken, my mum was equally sad”

I was really heartbroken for several days over stupid things back then. Seeing me so heartbroken affected my mum's mood also. My mum is not someone who is good at expressing her feelings towards us, so she dropped me a text telling me how much she loves me and that she wouldn't want to see me sad. It made me realise I should do my part as a daughter and give my parents the best of everything. I really appreciate all the support my mum secretly gave me without me realising. – Jocelynn Lee

5. “Her nagging saved my life--twice”

I really appreciate my mom's nagging. Being the scatter-brain that I am, her constant "reminders" are just what I need. In fact, there are times when her nagging turned out to be my life-savers. Once, when I was cooking, I almost dropped the knife and cut my foot because I mindlessly placed the knife at the edge of the basin after using it. Another time, I almost lost my iPhone after buying food. It was only when I remembered my mum's nagging that I managed to avoid both scenarios. Now that I am living alone, I miss her nagging even more. Every child thinks it's annoying when your mum nags at you but especially in an Asian society, where we seldom say "I love you" to express our love to each other openly, it’s our mums’ way of showing their love. – Xiao Ling

6. “She gave up her beauty and youth for her 3 kids”

My mummy is selfless. Even when she’s only left with $20 in her pocket, she will not mind sparing some for her kids. After looking at photos from when she was a teenager, I asked her why her skin wasn’t as good and why her teeth wasn’t as white now, and her answer just broke my heart. She said, “I’m too busy taking care of the three of you." She was so beautiful in her youth, and definitely still is, inside and out. I'm so afraid to see her grow old. Even though I don’t really express it to her, I love her so much. – Chendol Chun Li

7. “She wakes up at 5am to make us breakfast everyday”

One thing I really appreciate is how my mummy always goes the extra mile to prepare breakfast for us before school every morning at 5am. As a housewife, she could always wake up any time later but she makes a conscious effort to choose our happiness over her sleep everyday. After JC, when I spent the weekdays at home, I would see her waking up to prepare breakfast and going to sleep only after my brother leaves for school. It was only then that I realised that she would wake up early just to make breakfast for us. I was so touched and it made me realise that I should truly appreciate the small things she does for us. – Rennie Lee

8. “She carried me from the east to the west to see a doctor”

When I was young, I had a weak constitution. Even after going to several clinics, I didn’t recover. A neighbor recommended this doctor, and we had to travel from the east to the west to see him. She carried me on the bus and had to walk quite a bit. Through it all, she wasn’t in good health herself. Every night, she had to apply plasters all over her body to help her with her bodily ailments from working at rubber plantations. She suffered worry-filled, sleepless nights. I am so grateful to her. If it wasn’t for my mother’s persistence and patience, I may not be able to grow up healthily. – Tan Keith

9. “She rejects allowance money because she wants our kids to have the best instead"

My mum worked day and night just to make sure my brother and sisters have a good education. After reaching home from work, she had to do all the household chores. She also tries her best to tutor us even though she is not highly educated. Now, she has 10 grandkids from 3 of us and she has taken care of all of them. She has never wanted allowance from me for taking care of my 4 kids because she is always afraid that we do not have enough. She wants our kids to have the best instead. Besides ensuring their stomachs are filled, she even helps to ensure they do their homework and study for their exams. I really can’t thank her enough. – Grace Lim

10. “She never gave up on us despite her own pain”

An affair resulted in an ugly divorce between my parents, and my mum got custody of us. However, things went downhill from there as they sold the house and she rented a small room to stay in with my brother, while I had to find accommodation on my own. She could have chosen to just throw in the towel because of such a deep betrayal and hurt but she didn't. Instead, she held the family together the best she could through all her anger and pain. Even when she was going through the divorce, she never failed to go to the wet market weekly to cook for us and ensure we got fresh and healthy food. We've had terrible moments and emotional times but nothing will take away the fact that I have seen her steadfast, and I’ve received the unconditional love only a Mother can have for her children. – Kristyn Chan Siang

11. “She was so freaked out she carried me to the clinic for the second time”

Once, during my O-levels period, I had a severe gastric problem. I came home crying and my mum was concerned about what had happened to me. I had a paper the next day, so I wanted to study but I couldn't. The pain was intolerable. After several attempts at convincing me to see the doctor, I finally gave in. My mum carried me because I could barely walk. She then went around pleading the people in the clinic to let me go first. After I got an injection, my mum carried me back home. On the lift, I fainted. The next moment, I woke up to hear her crying and telling me to wake up. She was so freaked out that she carried me to the clinic again and asked for a referral to the hospital. But I didn't want to go, and rested at home. She slept beside me the entire night to take care of me, despite having had just 3 to 4 hours of sleep that day. The very next day, she brought me to school for my paper and even told the teacher to take good care of me. – Sherzy Tan

12. "She let me chart my own path”

Since I was old enough to start having memories, my mum would allow me to make my own choices in life. She listens and gives me advice but won't impose her views on me. Instead, she brings a new perspective to issues when I confide in her and she gives me the freedom to chart my path even though from her own experience, I was expected to fail. It would have been easier for her to cushion me than bear the heartache of me failing but she believes that failing is part and parcel of learning. When I have problems with difficult people, she encourages me to show empathy and compassion. I am often impressed by her magnanimity. I am most appreciative to have a wise mother who has shaped me into the independent woman I am today. – Hazel Seng

13. “My step-mum loved me like her own”

I grew up in a household where I had two mums living under one roof. My mum is my father’s second wife, and my step-mum was the one who looked after the house. She loved me like her own daughter. After I delivered two cute monsters, she loved them unconditionally too, as if they were her own grandsons. I’m so proud to tell people that I have a wonderful mother like her in my life. – Jas Li

14. “I am not a ‘model daughter’, but she still sings praises of me to others”

I was once an obedient and bright child. Then, I transitioned into a young delinquent. But even when I had dashed all her hopes of raising her "dream daughter", she never once gave up on me. I frequently got into trouble with authorities, slacked off on the books, and spent my time idling around with bad influence. From attending prize award ceremonies where she could be proud of my academic achievements to being called down by the school for my truancy, and waking up one day to find that I had run away from home... It was a lot of tears and heartache. Since then, I have learned from my ways and am still trying to make it up to her up till today. I am still a girl that does not fit her standards of a "model daughter". She would definitely not want me to have my tattoos and ostentatiously coloured hair if she had a choice. Still, she continues to shower me with her love everyday and sings praises of her kids in front of others. – Charmaine Wong

Appreciate Your Parents

Our mothers sacrifice their whole world for us, but don't forget our dads too. With Father's Day just round the corner, spend some time thinking about how you can show Dad some appreciation too! Also read, 12 S’poreans Reveal The Most Endearingly Embarrassing Habits Of Their Mums.

Have you ever felt paiseh from the way your mom shows her love to you? We have. When we were kids, we may not have realised the significance of the things our moms did for us. Now that we're older, we realise their love comes in many forms, from the biggest of sacrifices to the simplest of actions--even those that make us feel super paiseh.  From embarrassing us on Facebook to pronouncing things their own unique way, here are some heartwarming (and slightly embarrassing) moments these Singaporeans shared with their moms. *Some names have been changed for privacy reasons.

1. She’ll pout if I don’t hug her

She makes me hug her every day before I leave for work. If I don’t, she’ll pout and say: “Come back, never hug.” – Tyler Kor, 27

2. She calls me ‘bao bei’ in public

I’m already 30 this year, but my mom still calls me “bao bei” (Mandarin for ‘precious’) in front of people. It’s quite embarrassing but I know she means it as an endearment. – Roger, 30

3. She is very thick-skinned when it comes to discounts and freebies

My mother always asks for discounts and freebies because she wants to give us good food and freebies to try. Sometimes, even when the shop staff already said there’s no discount or freebies, she will still ask. Very malu! Also, when ordering food outside, she will ask for less oil, less sweet, and less salt over and over again. I know she does this for our health though. – Daphnie, 25

4. She likes to ‘expose’ the un-demure side of me

My room is always super messy and it’ll leave you wondering if I’m a guy living in a girl’s body. My mom always complains to my friends about my messy room. She even teases me about how she’ll reveal my un-demure side to my future boyfriend. I don’t have the guts to show anybody how bad the state of my wardrobe is but whenever there are guests in our house, my mom will ‘expose’ me and show it to them. So embarrassing! But I guess that’s her way of caring, since my messy room worsens my bad sinus. – Shi Shyan, 26

5. Her pronunciation of words is really cute

My mom pronounces ‘GB’ (gigabytes) as ‘Gib’, which isn’t wrong, but it’s wrong! She also says things like “later I apps you where we are” in reference to texting on Whatsapp, which I find really cute. – Mel, 27

6. She will ‘chope’ MRT seats for me

My mom will rush into trains and head straight for the seats and if it so happens that there’s an empty seat beside hers, she will put her hand on that seat to ‘chope’ it. Then, she will pat the seat as she waves at me and calls me to sit down. In front of staring eyes in the cabin, it’s actually very malu but I know she just wants me to rest, because I get tired easily from standing. – Bling, 26

7. She always tries to matchmake me with my friends

She will always try to matchmake me with friends I bring over. For example, there was once when I invited some close friends over for my birthday. One of whom is this girl who is very fair - a trait I think my mom likes. She started helping my mom to clean up after we ate. Obviously, my mom took a liking to that and in front of both that girl and me, my mom said that she will make a good girlfriend. Facepalm! – Li Wen, 21

8. She yells for my attention when I’m on the line

Whenever I'm on a phone call with my boyfriend, my mom will keep yelling for my attention, complaining about the untidily placed shoes, unwashed clothes and how dishes were left for to her wash, etc. Very embarrassing! – Xiang Ying, 29

9. She will walk around with a half-eaten chicken thigh

Having grown up in a time where having meat to eat was a luxury, my mom doesn't like wasting food--especially meat. If she cannot finish her food, she will tabao it home. One time, she couldn't finish her nasi padang, so she asked to tabao the chicken drumstick. We went shopping after that, so she walked around with this clear plastic bag with a chicken drumstick inside the whole time. – Yi Yang, 26

10. She’ll think that my girlfriend and I often ‘do things’ behind closed doors

Whenever my girlfriend is around, my mom will always knock on my room door and wait for a long time before opening it, or she’ll wait till we open it for her even though we shout that it’s ‘safe’ to come in. She does this 'cause she wants to give us privacy and doesn’t want to walk in on us ‘doing anything’. Little does she know that her doing that kind of makes it even more awkward sometimes. – Jay, 26

11. She likes to forward photos of me to her friends on Whatsapp

She likes to show me off in front of her friends and on Facebook. She always asks me to send her pictures of myself. She will then forward these pictures to her multiple Whatsapp groups. And she always tells me that her friends want to matchmake me with their sons. I feel so paiseh sometimes! – Zaf, 27

12. She calls me ‘sweetie’ and ‘cutie pie’ on Facebook

She likes to call me pet names on Facebook, like 'princess', 'daddy's girl', 'sweetie', and 'cutie pie’. I don’t know if she knows people can see her comments but she never stops. Also, when I was younger, my mom would get jealous when I talked to my dad. Even now, she’s a bit sensitive but it's a lot better already. – Natasha, 26

Share Your Love!

What are some of the silly things your mom does that you find quite endearing? Share them with us in the comments! Also read, S’poreans Confess The Dumbest Things They Believed As Kids – Thank God We Know Better Now.

People say kids say the darndest things. I say we were told the darndest things. We’ve all heard stories like how we've been picked up from the long kang, or that the mangali or the police will catch us if we’re naughty. We asked millennials what other ridiculous things they believed as gullible kids and here are their hilarious stories.

The Classic Tales

1. “A tree will grow out from my stomach and my mouth if I swallow seeds.” – Celine 2. “That the moon is a spy because it follows us everywhere.” – Alvin 3. “If you sleep beside a boy, you will get pregnant.” – Carmela 4. “I shouldn’t hold the chopsticks too high when I eat noodles, or else I will marry someone from far, far away. Who knows, I’m dating a Malaysian now, so quite true?” – Natasha 5. “The amount of rice left in your bowl after a meal will determine how many pimples your future wife/husband's face will have.” – Daniel 6. “If you point at the moon and don’t apologise, the moon will cut your ear.” “Cannot shake leg, if not money will fly away.” – Roger 7. “That sweets can grow ants! The very first time, my mum told me in Mandarin “生蚂蚁” (literally translated to mean grow ants), and after that, really seeing sweets with ants, I believed it.” “I used to believe that when I tell lies, my nose will grow like Pinocchio. When I was young, I would always hold my nose after I told a lie, and when adults kept saying that I have a really high nose, I believed it was because of lies.” – Wynn

The Monsters

8. “I believed in the Window Monster. My mom said that if I lean on the window, the Window Monster will grab me.” – Annabelle 9. “You know those black, round manhole covers on the floor of wet markets? I used to think that there are crocodiles inside. My sister told me she lied to me back then because she just wanted to scare me.” – Kristin 10. “It was very popular for those Chinese zombie movies to be playing on TV back then. The zombies are those that will hop around with a yellow talisman on their foreheads. My mom wanted me to bring a talisman to school as a form of protection, non-related to the zombies. When I refused, she told me it was to stop a zombie if I encountered one, just so I would bring the talisman out with me.” – Wen 11. “My brother used to believe in the Toilet Ghost. His back faces the toilet when he uses the computer at home, so he's afraid of it. He still keeps the toilet door closed today, and he’s still scared of bathing at night.” – Mindy

The Dental Stories

12. “My mom made me believe that if I don’t finish my rice, my teeth will start dropping. I remember there was once I didn’t finish my rice and the next day my baby tooth came loose and dropped out. I kept crying and went to the rice container and said sorry and I wanted my tooth back.” – Kenny 13. “When your baby teeth fall off, if it’s the upper set of teeth, you have to throw it out of the window downwards, and if it’s the lower set of teeth, then you have to throw it upwards. This is so that when you grow up, you will have prefect, straight teeth.” 14. “My parents also made me believe in the Tooth Fairy. They would secretly stash coins under my pillow in place of my tooth.” – Daphnie

The Innocent Ones

15. “My grandma used to have the Rediffusion radio box, and the wire ran into one of the other rooms in her house. Like, it ran up the wall to the ceiling then all the way into another room. It seemed like that room was always locked so I used to think someone was inside doing the show, until we moved and they unlocked the room. I found out it was just a storeroom with a power socket.” – Eugene 16. “My preschool teacher would scare me, saying that if I was naughty, she would put a cone over me and make my head disappear.” - Kenny 17. “I used to believe the MSG packets in Mamee Noodles were silicon packets. My mom said it's to keep the noodle dry and that I will die if I ate it. One day I saw a friend open and pour the MSG packet in and I was so horrified, I told him he will die. That's when I learnt I was cheated by my mom.” – Bling

The Ones About Nature

18. “My friend believed that plants have blood too, like animals.” – Bing Han 19. “I used to believe rock sugar came from real rocks. I found out it was a lie when I scrubbed a random rock for a long time.” – Wendy 20. “If you step on a snail and the shell cracks, it will become huge and eat you up.” – Mai 21. “Back in my mother's kampong in Malaysia, she would give me a small plate of salt and told me to feed the snails when they appear. She said it's their favourite food. I didn't understand why they would disappear after I fed them but she assured me the snails are just shy. Turns out she just didn't want them to ruin her vegetable garden and made me do the dirty work instead.” – Samantha

The Truly Singaporean Ones

22. “I used to believe that Santa Claus would come from the rubbish chute because HDBs got no chimneys and the chute was the closest thing.” – Samantha 23. “I stay in Bukit Batok and used to think Tampines was just next door, because whenever my father drives us out to Tampines, I would sleep in the car and wake up already there.” – Jeremy

The Very Weird Ones

24. “If you bite your fingernails, those leftover fingernails will run to a corner by themselves and when there's enough, it will make a clone of you and take over you – thanks Mr Midnight.” – Jun Yuan 25. “I believed my parents didn't pull my limbs as much as they did for my brothers when we were babies, that's why I'm so short.” “Last time I thought that if I don't shit out from below, the shit will accumulate and come out from my mouth.” – Yun Jie What are some ridiculous or silly things you believed as a kid? Share them with us in the comments below! Also read, The JC Merger Marks The End Of An Era – These Ex-Students Share Their Last Goodbye

Those of you familiar with American TV shows will probably be familiar with kids getting grounded or being made to eat veggies when they misbehaved. For us Singaporeans, discipline takes on quite a different shape and form. We spoke to some Singaporeans about the way they were punished as kids. Some of these are so extreme, you'll realize how good you had it as a kid!

1. Kena whack by all sorts of things

A classic punishment most of us have been through and survived is caning. Some of our parents were so sadistic, they made us choose our own canes at the mama shop. We happily chose our favourite colour and the smallest one because child logic says the smaller, the better. We would eventually come to realise how very wrong we were. Some of us would hide the canes or secretly break them or throw them away, but that wouldn't stop our parents. Even if the cane broke mid-whooping, the horror would continue and we would run around the house, screaming as our parents chased us down with belts, rulers, hangers, feather dusters, and even back scratchers. #goodtimes One girl, Samantha, was even forced to wear a short-sleeved shirt and shorts to school to show the marks from her caning, leaving one to wonder if the pain from the caning or the public shaming was the real punishment.

2. Being made to kneel everywhere, on everything

Kneeling on a washing board, kneeling on coins, being made to kneel through the night without sleep, facing the wall or in front of the altar... Eugene's dad made him kneel on an abacus! And that's not all. After half an hour, when his skin seemed like it was about to tear, his dad got him to kneel on sandpaper! And the offence? Failing his Primary 6 Chinese exam.

3. Being locked in

As a child, getting locked in can be terrifying, as in the case of 3-year-old Daniel, who was locked in the toilet at night, with no lights on. It could have been just 5 minutes, but it felt like a lifetime, leaving him with a fear of the dark to this day. For Melissa, who refused to go to school because they changed her teacher, her mum tied her leg to a table's leg and left her in the room for hours.

4. Being locked out

Breaking curfew usually led to us being locked out. For Oliver, it was an especially cold punishment as he was locked out in the freezing London weather. Ubaidah, who used to fight verbally with her younger brother often, got locked out with her brother by her dad so they could fight as much as they wanted. He told them they won’t be allowed in until he saw blood, although of course, that didn't happen. Some fathers take ‘throwing you out’ quite literally, as did Chun Seng's, who was physically carried and thrown out of the house.

5. Being used as target practice

Jamie lost her wallet and didn’t dare to tell her parents. Her mum got so angry when she found out, she threw a dictionary at her.

6. The passive aggressive treatment

Some of our parents would ignore us, filling us with guilt by saying absolutely nothing at all. We'd question if they've stopped loving us and end up apologising. Clarice ended up with no dinner because she fiddled with food previously.

7. These ones are just sibei jialat

Eugene thought kneeling on an abacus and sandpaper was enough a punishment for failing his Chinese exam, but his dad didn’t think so. At 12 years old, he was picked up from school by his dad, driven further away from home, and then told to get off the car and to walk home himself. One mum learnt from some of her friends to force-feed daughter, Belle, chili-padi. When she refused to open her mouth, she ended up rubbing it all over her lips. As a Primary school kid, the spiciness stung horribly. Wen suffered a similar demise, with her mum applying chili sauce on her lips like lip gloss.

8. The prize for most creative punishment goes to...

As shared by Annabelle, her dad wrapped her up with a cloth and hung her on the wall when she was about 2 years old. What are some unforgettable (or unorthodox) methods your parents have used to punish or discipline you? Let us know in the comments! Also read, 15 S’poreans Share The Sweetest Thing Their Partner Has Done That Will Make You Say ‘Spoil Market’ (Top Image Credit: Oi Vietnam)

“I can’t wait to grow up!” "Why can't I skip this whole part and just be an adult!" Oh no, there is no fast forward button in this thing we call life. I don’t know about you, but growing into adulthood was one hell of a journey for me. When you grow up, you grow out of who you used to be, and sometimes, you grow apart from the people you used to be close with. The girls in class you used to be #bffs with, that one special person you shared a special romance with. You went everywhere, did everything together. You guys were inseparable. Like a ‘buy 1 free 1’ package deal; like an egg to an otherwise kosong prata. They were forever to you--were. The hard truth is, sometimes, forever is but a spoken word.

Why You Need To Let It Go

When the truth hits you right in the face, it sucks. But do you let it bog you down, or do you just forget it and enjoy the ride? I once had a best friend who broke up with her partner because of how mentally abusive the relationship got. He moved on to the next girl fairly quickly, but she just couldn’t. As someone who cared a lot about her, it was heartbreaking to see her resorting to hanging around his house, hoping just to catch a glimpse of him. It was even more painful to see her putting herself down, comparing herself to his new girl. It definitely didn’t help that she denied being hung up on him – which brings me to my next point.

Be Honest With Yourself

Are YOU happy? If your answer is not a straight out, 100% yes, then you need to think about why this isn’t so. Maybe you really loved the person and you truly believe you won't find another like them. Maybe you feel like you lost a part of yourself that you can never find back. Maybe you envisioned a perfect future that included them and now that they're gone, you can't imagine any other kind of future. Maybe you feel like you just aren't good enough for anyone or anything. If you relate to any of this, or if you're going through these crappy emotions you wish you didn't have to go through, you are certainly not alone. Acknowledge your feelings and know that what you feel is okay. I've gone through these emotions myself, and so have many, many others. The sleepless nights, the tears you shed behind bathroom doors, the “Oh, I’m just tired” you say to people, pretending everything is okay, the fear you have of never finding someone else like them, the difficulty of trusting people again, the flashbacks you get whenever you see, hear, taste, or smell anything remotely associated with them. It’s painful, and it sucks.

Deal With It

So... What can you do about it? Here’s a blunt but handy flowchart which really helped me through my own tough times.

Granted, it doesn't give you any specific instructions on how to let go, but that's the thing: there isn't a clear-cut way to deal with your emotions. There isn’t a step-by-step cheat sheet to teach you how to let go and move on.

The only thing you can do is either A – decide to do something about it, or B – STFU and move on. Don’t complain. Don’t live your life in despair. Don’t live in denial. Don’t feel sorry for yourself. At the end of the day, what are you going to do for yourself?

Do Something For Yourself

Ironically enough, when I stopped giving a shit, when I stopped replaying in my head all the times I had to let go of the many treasured friendships and relationships I've had, life became a lot less shitty. I started doing things for myself. I went on shopping sprees. I ran. I made an effort to take up dance classes again. I caught up with old friends. I appreciated my family. I splurged to explore the world. Heck, I even resorted to Tinder to curb my loneliness. I decided to let go, to let loose. I decided to make my sunshine in the storm. I made a conscious effort to be happy, and it worked.

Perspective Changes Everything

Letting go of someone can be hard, but it is only as hard as you make it out to be. Dig deep and find yourself. Only then will you know how to let go and be happy. After all, no one knows you better than you. Nothing new is going to magically appear in the fridge if you don’t put something into it. Nothing will change if you’re not going to do anything about it. So get out there and do something--anything! Channel your emotions into things that will benefit you. Do some exercise, clean up your room, take up a new hobby, do that one thing you’ve always wanted to do but never got the chance to because of whatever reasons. It could be the most liberating, most empowering thing, and it could be the very thing you need. Let go of things that are not meant for you, because what is meant to be, will be.