Protests are springing up across the globe since the inauguration of the tweet-happy King of Petty and his weeklong reign of #AlternativeFacts. From the millions that showed for the Women’s March to the people flooding the airports to protest the Muslim Ban - can any of us remember the last time the public mobilised in such staggering numbers? Halfway across the world in Singapore, watching the news roll in, you might be feeling a little helpless. Or maybe even a little removed from the situation. After all, it’s not like we can stage our own protest because of post-CNY food comas... and other more law-entrenched reasons. But even in the face of Trump’s executive order horrors, you can’t help but see the slight silver lining in all of this. Lawyers holding signs at the airport offering their services pro bono, Google putting together a crisis fund, Airbnb offering free housing to those affected by Trump’s executive orders… humanity is coming through. There are ways to show solidarity from a distance. If you feel so inclined, you can donate to the <a href=" Anti-Racist Collaboration or the ACLU. If not, that’s okay too. There are causes closer to home that could use our help. Migrant Workers Home They are crucial to the day-to-day running of Singapore, but so often marginalised and forgotten. This country relies on low-skilled foreign workers to take on tasks most wouldn’t deign to do, and the least we can do is lend a hand in making their voices heard. Home (Humanitarian Organisation for Migration Economics) is a registered charity that helps raise awareness around migrant worker rights and advocates for foreign workers who’ve been unfairly treated by employers. They funnel donations into providing shelter, legal assistance, upskilling workers and holding educational seminars for both migrants and Singaporeans. Visit www.home.org.sg to see how you can get involved. Itsrainingraincoats​ Itsrainingraincoats​ is a local initiative that supports migrant workers by (you guessed it!) providing them with raincoats. Founder and lawyer Dipa Swaminathan was moved after witnessing a group of workers on a construction site in a thunderstorm, chipping away with only garbage bags as shelter. A strong advocator of their well being, she now organises donation drives and gives out items like raincoats and sim cards to migrant workers in Singapore. Small acts of kindness make a big difference - visit https://www.facebook.com/pg/itsrainingraincoats/ to see what you can do! Gender Equality Casa Raudha Casa Raudha is a women’s home - a haven for those who’ve been abandoned, abused or simply have nowhere to go. They provide computer rooms and an art therapy room, as well as a playground for children. Casa Rauda also runs various workshops and entrepreneurship programs for these women, returning a sense of agency to their lives. Financial aid, medical assistance and counselling are among the services provided. Head over to www.casaraudha.org to find out how you can get involved - volunteers are always welcome! We Can! Singapore This organisation takes a stand against discriminatory attitudes and violence toward women. It’s part of a larger, global campaign that is spread across countries like Tanzania, Kenya, India and Afghanistan. Its goal is to promote healthy relationships and gender equality via interactive theatre and workshops with various local collaborators. How can you get involved? Throw your support behind the White Ribbon Campaign - you can volunteer, take the pledge or donate to the cause - <a href=" Aware The last time you may have heard Aware (Association of Women for Action and Research) surfacing might've been in the high profile Teenage Magazine scuffle of last year. This group is a strong advocate of equal opportunities for both men and women - in education, employment and also in terms of sex and reproductive rights. They run corporate and school programs, support groups and counselling for victims of sexual violence, a free legal clinic as well as extensive research projects. There are numerous ways to get involved - Aware offers internships on top of the usual donation and volunteering avenues -  We may not be facing anything as drastic as a ban on an entire religion or an assault on women’s reproductive health. Regardless, there are enough issues at hand where we can put our money where our mouth is. January has seen 2017 with a rocky start, but hopefully with a bit of compassion, it’s only up from here!

It puts your memory to the test

Seriously, working at a cocktail bar is no joke. You need to have anything from a dozen to over a hundred cocktail recipes memorised, as well as knowledge of their variations and the ability to adapt according to taste profiles. You need to know when to shake and when to stir, when double straining a drink is needed (hint: it involves egg white). If you work at a bar that puts a large emphasis on spirits, you’ll have to be able to describe the nuances between say, a single malt scotch and straight bourbon whiskey. It’s a lot of fun and half the time you feel like a mixologist in a lab experimenting with flavours. Sure, it’s something that comes with practice but people always tend to underestimate the sheer volume of study that’s involved.

And yet, you’re often stereotyped as unintelligent

There’s just something about being a female bartender in Singapore. Sometimes even the most well-meaning people tend to associate ‘working in hospitality’ with ‘unintelligent’ or ‘unsophisticated’. It’s an unconscious bias that manifests itself unnervingly often - customers come off as patronising or condescending when addressing people in the service industry. It’s pretty ironic, given the level of memorisation involved in bartending. And that mentality tends to disregard the fact that many people have a life outside the bar. I’ve worked alongside a host of amazing women - some of them writers, painters and aspiring bar owners. Others are putting themselves through university. It’s not a lack of ambition or intelligence that saddles them with the job - to the contrary, it’s the incredible drive they possess to pursue their passion and make ends meet at the same time.

You get all the gossip

You know that recurring TV gag where a depressed dude plops himself down at a bar, orders ‘something strong’ and starts spilling his guts to the bartender? Well, this is more or less true. It’s a scenario that often plays out on a slow night during the work week. Something about bartending must make you approachable, because people tend to let their guard down and get really loose-lipped as the night wears on (this may or may not have something to do with the volume of alcohol consumed). Not only do you get to hear the juicy tidbits about people's love lives and careers, sometimes you get to witness it too!

And you learn how to read people

All hail Tinder and this rise of online dating. Bartenders become very astute at picking out whether a solitary drinker is actually 'waiting for a friend’ or a low-key Tinderer instead. You learn the tell-tale signs - they arrive to scout out the location, leave and then return. Or they order a drink at the bar and sit there nervously picking apart the coasters. You learn the do’s and don’ts of dating from afar. People watching, especially on a slow night at the bar, is the greatest teacher.

Unwelcome advances are part and parcel of the job

I've talked about female bartenders without mentioning the most obvious and unfortunate aspect of the job - unwelcome advances from customers. Lucky for me, while I was working I seldom felt harassed, and the most I’d get was verbal back and forth. Sometimes it was cheeky, sometimes it was just plain crude and sometimes (rarely) things would get handsy. To take a more optimistic view - rather than saying all men are crap - I try to attribute it to the pack mentality. You know, when a group of guys are drinking together and out to impress and out-do each other, so they act in ways they wouldn’t when alone. Still, no women should have to stand there and take lewd comments. So you do learn how to fend off their advances. You learn to read the room and whether the best response would be feigning obliviousness, humour, or calling their bluff with a sarcastic one-liner.

Friends before coworkers

One of the best things about bartending is that your coworkers and regulars become your family. You see them on a daily basis, navigate the ups and the downs as a team, and defend each other against drunken customers who are #thirstyaf. There are many ways to bond with people, but doing so over a beer is one of the most tried and trusted methods out there. Plus, working at a bar will eventually land you with a group of regulars. It’s a quid pro quo arrangement. You’re on a first name basis with them and remember their drink orders, while they often swing by with random novelty gifts from their travels… or maybe just Haribo candy to see you through a long shift. To quote the immortal words of Christina Aguilera (or James Brown, depending on how old you are), bartending is still widely thought of as a man’s, man’s, man’s world.  But the last few years have seen an explosion of female bartenders, especially the cocktail haunts of Ann Siang, Keong Saik and the CBD. Watch this space - they’re taking the all-boys club by storm!

It’s throwback time! Let’s wind the clock back, all the way to our primary school years. Remember how you’d observe the P6s - how tall and old and worldly they seemed. Or even peering at our seniors as a lowly Sec 1 kid, having just lost your place as top dog in the school. Now that you think about it, they were a mere three years older but it still seemed ages away. Growing up, we’d plot our futures - financially independent with a house… married with your first kid… I for one, definitely wanted a dog. We’d have it all together. And we’d do it by the distant, arbitrary age of... let's say 27. Now, fast forward to present day. Whether you’ve just hit the big 2-1 or are edging toward the dreaded realm of the mid-twenties, suddenly 27 doesn’t seem so far away.  And suddenly, you realise you’re not going to wake up one day and be an adult. Things aren’t going to magically fall into place. In fact, you have no idea what you’re doing.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

It’s an interview question staple. And if it’s not 5 years, it’s 10. Having grand vision for ourselves indicates ambition, drive, a sense of self and what we want out of life. It’s been drummed into us that we need to know where we’re headed and a timeline to our eventual success. We need a master plan - or so society claims. There are benchmarks we need to meet - the steady relationship (let’s not even discuss the impending CNY doom a.k.a interrogation about our love lives), the dream job, a flourishing family. And if you haven’t checked these boxes, well… you done f#*ked up, haven’t you? The pressure to be perfect is intense - it’s okay if you crack a little. This isn’t even factoring in our obsessively curated social media feeds, just another method in which we stack ourselves up against the flawless and highly photogenic lives of family and friends. While we’re so busy trying to plan our lives down to the minute details, we forget that sometimes there are elements of life that are simply beyond our control. As the (instagram sourced) saying goes - life happens; coffee helps.

Failing forward

We’re all scared of failure, and rightly so. No one wants to go after something only to fall short. But when we equate something not going right as outright failure, we’re telling ourselves it’s all essentially wasted time. We believe that settling into a particular university course will dictate our career for the next 40 years - never mind that we had to pick our degrees fresh out of JC knowing very little of ourselves and the world. God forbid we swap majors or deviate from the career path it sets out for us. Or if a long term relationship ends, the fact that it didn’t end in marriage makes it a failure as well. In doing so, we end up negating all the things we’ve learned along the way. Through trying a bunch of things and changing your mind every now and again, you’re not wasting time, you’re getting to know yourself a little better. Life is a series of trial and error, and what you’re doing is learning.

People change

So now that we’ve established that feeling a little lost does NOT make you a failure, here’s something else to chew on. If you’re wondering what the heck you’re doing with your life, perhaps it means you’re in a sort of limbo. Maybe you’re in the process of realising what you once wanted for yourself no longer holds true now. Give yourself permission to be fluid and flexible. People change, circumstances change and so will your ambitions. Here’s why not knowing is a good thing - you channel it into fuel and let it feed your drive. Because no one ever really has it all figured out, and operating under the illusion that you do and you have your path laid out before you kills that hunger.

What do you want?

Screw knowing what you’re going to do with your life - it’s time to tweak this existential spiral of question. Think about what you’re doing today instead. It’s great to have a clear plan and an end goal in mind but if you don’t, well that’s just fine too. And the best bet to give yourself one is taking baby steps. Ask yourself “what do I want” - not some grand, hazy notion to come to pass in 30 years time, but in everyday things. What interests you? Who are the important people in your life? What do you like about yourself? What are things you might want to change? A little bit of introspection never hurt anyone. Explore how your values govern how you make decisions. The core truths will emerge, the ones that will carry you through career changes, relationship upsets and low key existential crises. So f#*k not knowing what the f#*k you’re doing with your life, because life will always be plagued with some element of uncertainty. Work on yourself instead, because security in who you are is one of the best navigational tools in your arsenal. Top Image Credit

Call it a love letter to Los Angeles, an ode to starry-eyed dreamers, a revival of Golden Age Hollywood glam - La La Land checks all of those boxes and then some! The film is bursting at the seams with colour and whimsy, but at no point during the brilliantly choreographed musical numbers between Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling does it feel anything short of genuine. Like all good movies, behind the dazzling screenplay is unexpected emotional heft. For something that promises a flight of fancy, the film manages to leave us with several life lessons worth unpacking. So if you haven’t seen La La Land yet, hit pause and head to the cinemas. Partly because it’s tipped for an Oscar, partly because Ryan Gosling is in it (hey girl) but mostly - MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD.

Lesson 1. Chasing a pipe dream...

The premise of the movie is simple - boy meets girl, and the pair hit it off in a series of meet-cutes and meaningful glances. But theirs isn’t the only love story in the film. Both know exactly what their passions are and what they want out of life - they pursue their goals with a relentless and restless energy. Boy (Sebastian) is a old school jazz musician and self professed romantic with grand plans to open his own jazz club. Girl (Mia) is an aspiring actress stuck serving lattes on a studio lot. The film is a shout out to anyone who’s ever felt like what they love to do doesn’t exactly fit the societal mold, or that they have an end goal in mind but no idea how to get there. There are few career paths more murky than being successful in the performing arts - so let Mia and Sebastian’s spunky take on Hollywood inspire you!

Lesson 2. … and knowing when (or if) to give up

La La Land celebrates the dreamers and the fantasies we spin for ourselves - but it’s not a red carpet journey the entire way. It’s easy to watch someone’s idealised scenario flash across the big screen as we often imagine it for ourselves in our own heads, being their best selves and living out their dreams unencumbered. But the movie weaves in elements of melancholy, acknowledging that some fantasies don’t play out in reality - most poignantly when Mia’s ambitions are shattered as her one-woman play is poorly received. It’s an unwelcome reminder of reality and our own shortcomings. The issue isn’t laid out in black and white; the need to be realistic and make ends meet war with the shoulda-would-couldas throughout the film. La La Land doesn’t provide the answers, but it does show that it is 100% okay to feel in doubt.

Lesson 3. Personal versus romantic love

Fasten your seatbelt folks, because this is where the real spoilers happen. In the film, viewers are fed this bittersweet grain of truth: love and career don’t always mix. Relationships are give and take, and when both parties have ambitions that involve copious amounts of time, energy and distance… well, sometimes you honestly can’t have both. It’s a low key kick in the gut for all the uber romantics lured to watch by the promise of song, dance and a little romance. La La Land has all the makings of a cosmopolitan fairy tale, and this is the one thread that grounds the film and keeps its characters genuinely relatable - a melancholic sense that as good as they are together, Mia and Sebastian may not achieve what they set out to if they remain a couple.

Lesson 4. Time and place

Many of the film’s most beautiful moments happen as brilliant choreography, charismatic leads and the twinkling lights of LA collide. But what resonates the strongest are the final 15 minutes of the movie, where we are treated to a montage of what is and what could have been - the perfect combination of whimsical and wistful. Mia and Sebastian were undeniable #couplegoals, pushing each other to fulfill their respective ambitions and providing solace when things didn’t pan out. They were instrumental to each other’s success and exactly what the other needed at that point in time. But as we all well know, times change. What made you happy once may not make you as happy now. You may have multiple great loves in your life but it doesn’t make any of them lesser. La La Land is an ode to dreamers, to the wild and fantastical plans we have for ourselves and sometimes, that we share with others. It also recognises life’s ability to knock us off course from time to time, and that’s where the movie really comes through for us. Instead of making it feel dull and tragic, it makes it all appear extraordinarily okay. <a href=" Image Credit

Being likeable. It's something we're taught from a young age and is quite difficult to shrug off, this idea that likeability is an essential part of being a woman. We're meant to hold back, not be overly pushy, or loud, or say too much because in order to make our way in the world, we need to play nicely. But what happens when we make nice our number one priority?

You let other people direct your relationships.

When we try too hard to be likeable, the first thing to go is a sense of agency. We’re afraid to ask for too much or be too much, so we only want from others what they appear to want from us. …at least, that’s as much as you’ll admit to yourself. It's hardly a fulfilling way to operate, whether these relationships are professional or personal. In fact, you’re doing yourself a big disservice when you invest in a person and it's a one way street.

Negotiating your opinions.

Finding common ground - it’s the instinctive thing to do. Remember the rather questionable logic that if a boy picks on you in the playground, it means he likes you? Well surprise, surprise, that little adage does not fly in the real world. Whether in the workplace or on a Tinder date, nobody wants to be the first to offend. So we dish out tentatively phrased, easily digestible opinions. Things you may personally believe waver depending on the person you’re talking to. You remain quiet even when the chance to speak out presents itself. While it may be a harmless thing to do once or twice, making a habit out of diluting your views means you’re missing out on opportunities to clarify them. These are the things that shape you as a person, and talking - even disagreeing - with others can be a validating experience. Being different isn’t a bad thing.

Losing your voice.

The very social media-centric terms of “mansplaining” and “manterrupting” seem like they were coined specifically for hashtag purposes, but unfortunately for us women, they describe something all too real. How many of us can attest to trying to explain something, only to have a man needlessly interrupt or take our ideas and run with them? Backing up this phenomenon, the <a href=" app tracks (with illuminating results) just how often men and women speak up while at work. For a woman to speak up at work, it involves a balancing act of Cirque de Soleil proportions. Either she voices her thoughts and is perceived as too aggressive or a know-it all, or she’s barely heard. And when a man surfaces virtually the same idea, the default is a round of head nods and approval for his fine idea. There are countless <a href=" to prove it. So, it doesn’t exactly come as a shock that more often than not, we put our heads down and decide that less is more, that it’s better to be nice than to be heard. But if the absolutely boss women of the 21st century (hello, Angela Merkel, Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama) have taught us anything at all, it’s to not be afraid of acknowledging our own expertise. If speaking up means being a #NastyWoman, so be it!

Your goals take a backseat.

Growing up, we were conditioned to put others first. We’re taught that the moral, socially responsible thing to do is to care for everyone else and when you slip into the bottom rungs of your own priority list, well, that’s pretty noble. While it's true that so much good can come out of a little selflessness, sometimes this mentality spills over into less benevolent circumstances. Like when you end up holding yourself back at your own expense - prioritising the feelings of someone who is hurting you, or feeling embarrassed about asking for a promotion you’re pretty sure you deserve. Sometimes, to put yourself first is practical, not selfish. That people have unconscious biases based on gender is a given, and you need to factor that in when you try to soften your approaches. You need to invest in yourself as much as you do others, because no way are you sacrificing your goals in an effort to be "nice". Your job isn't to make yourself likeable - it's to be your full self, someone who is honest and aware and embracing of yourself and others. It's to be ambitious and hopeful and real - basically, you just need to do you. The world will have to deal with it.

https://www.facebook.com/Urbanites.co/posts/1785171758398789

For the last eight years, Michelle Obama has been a shining beacon in the White House for females, healthy food, fashion… even reppin’ Missy Elliot! Politics notwithstanding, she’d have learned a thing or two in her tenure as First Lady. So as 2016 draws to a close, she has some choice words for women everywhere. “Live out loud,” she said in an interview with Oprah. “Understand that what’s in your brain is really useful. Do not hide it. Don’t dumb it down. Don’t apologize for it. Just put it on the table and let people deal with it.” Now, that’s brave. And bold. And a little bit sassy. Obviously, we’re making it our mantra for 2017. But in the meantime, here’s to the women out there who are brave, bold and a little bit sassy. These are 4 reasons why you should stay exactly as you are.

1. You don’t back down - especially if it’s something you’re passionate about

Do you have that one topic that comes up in conversation from time to time, and that's guaranteed to trigger a heated discussion? GOOD (Note: not argument, discussion. Healthy, healthy debate). If you know what’s important to you and where you stand on a certain issue, when someone brings it up, you’re sure as hell going to say something. And being opinionated is not something to be apologetic about. Let’s just pause and think about the number of times we’ve hesitated to speak up at work because we’re worried about the negative connotations associated with disagreeing with someone. Or how many exclamation marks or smiley faces we tack on to the end of a message that doesn’t actually need them. And how many of us have inwardly cringed upon hearing our own voices go up a few pitches talking to someone - all this so we come across as appropriately bubbly and approachable? That’s all just the tip of the iceberg. We haven’t even touched on all the times we’ve deflected compliments for work we put hours of effort into doing. There’s no denying that we moderate ourselves around other people, but being perceived as nice doesn’t have to be the pinnacle of what a female can be. If you’re good at something, own it. And if you have an opinion on something, and freely and firmly express it regardless of how well it may be received, more power to you!

2. BUT if disagreement happens, you listen and consider opposing points of view

Just a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T… Aretha Franklin really nailed it there. Sassy doesn’t mean stubborn. Just because you have your own opinions doesn’t mean you don’t respect the views of others. Sure, you might not be the most agreeable person on the planet but you’re not above listening either. There’s something to be said for holding strong beliefs and defending them, while accepting that someone else may lie on the opposite end of the spectrum. There’s a wide array of thinking, and blind acceptance isn’t the only way to peacefully co-exist.

3. You’re not afraid to question

Whether it’s to clarify your thoughts or probe into others', you don’t pretend to understand things you don’t - you ask instead. You were that kid in primary school who 100% embraced the whole idea that there are no stupid questions. Maybe you took it that one step further and became the bane of your teacher’s life with all your (intentionally borderline stupid) asks. But hey, it just means you’re a straight-shooter. You’re as in touch with what you know as what you don’t know, and that sort of knowledge is power.

4. You love a challenge

And not just when it comes to a good debate. That fearless attitude toward expressing yourself and your opinions - that translates to your approach to life too! Your ability to hold firm against outside influences shapes your ability to handle most setbacks. Excuse the cheesy analogy drawn from a litany of female empowerment quotes on the interwebs, but if you want to teach em’ young to #staywoke, this is the lesson for girls to learn: You are not a sponge tossed about in a world where the odds are stacked against you, absorbing outsider’s perceptions of you, absorbing the gender pay gap, absorbing awful fashion trends even. You are a rock. You don’t defer to the powers that be, you stand against them. So, let’s hear it for the sassy women out there who never underestimate themselves, who stand their ground and wear their opinions proudly (resting bitch face optional).

Confession time: when Pottermore came out, I was one of those uber-keen teens that signed up for their subscription emails and who scrambled to take the Sorting Quiz the second it was released. Now, for the even bigger confession: I was sorted into Hufflepuff. Following that shattering realisation, I took it upon myself to create another account for a do over, landing myself in Ravenclaw. But that’s beside the point. Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Slytherin - it’s no secret those are the houses people aspire to. No one wants to be in Hufflepuff, the house that “took the lot”, as the Sorting Hat sang. No one wants to be in the house made up of leftovers. We may as well be muggles. So what led to decades of Hufflepuff disdain?

1. Animal preference

The Hufflepuff mascot is a badger. And when pitted against a lion, a snake, and a raven, it comes off as pretty obscure. To add insult to injury, it doesn’t exactly look like the badass of the bunch either (this video  begs to differ). J.K. Rowling herself wondered whether Hogwarts house perceptions would have shifted if she’d gone with a bear instead of a badger. If anything, it’d probably lead to a flood of Hufflepuff-related Winnie the Pooh memes.

2. House Traits

Let’s talk about how Hufflepuff was portrayed in the books. None of it was explicitly damaging, but the Sorting Hat’s infamous line “I’ll take the lot” seemed to cast Hufflepuffs as the ones who lack a special trait. Gryffindors are brave. Ravenclaws are clever. Slytherins are ambitious. And Hufflepuffs? Not quite enough to fit into any of those categories but hey, we’re loyal and hard-working! All of these characteristics are admirable in their own right, but we tend to latch on to the hidden meaning society has them tagged with. Bravery doesn’t just mean you’re fearless, it also means you’re prone to heroics and fits of self-sacrifice. Intelligence is a trait that will always be highly valued. Ambition is drive, and no one can begrudge you that. But what about being hardworking?

3. Good is boring

Well, instead of being acknowledged for a strong work ethic and determination, “hard-working” is sometimes equated with the rather conciliatory “well, you tried”. And let’s be real, no one wants to read a book about an A for effort protagonist. In fact, what made Harry such an interesting character was that he was inherently flawed. The flipside of bravery is being foolhardy, headstrong and inclined to grandeur. Ambition gives way to egocentricity and intelligence to a cold detachment. Each of these Hogwarts house traits come with baggage every bit as unattractive as Hufflepuff’s wallflower tendencies - maybe even more so, given how they play into the “brooding male hero” archetype so often seen on the silver screen.

4. Yellow is not a flattering colour

It just isn't. People can rock a red and gold scarf or a green and silver combo on any given day, and blue is a wardrobe staple. Yellow… not so much. Oh, Hufflepuff. The butt of every joke, the source of comic relief in every sketch, and the well of shame for every hardcore Potter fan due to the inevitable Twilight crossover references. But here’s my suggestion to all the Hogwarts house haters out there - it’s time to acknowledge that no one is a cookie cutter replica of the traits the Sorting Hat espouses. Let’s agree to be done with Hufflepuff hate! I wish we could all just get along. I wish I could bake a cake out of unicorns and smiles… oh wait, wrong movie. Luckily, the tide is turning for this long-maligned Hogwarts house. J.K. Rowling declared 2015 the dawn of the Age of Hufflepuff, and this year she blessed us with not one, but two new Harry Potter releases. One is a play (unfortunately, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child is available to us only in written form) and the other, a brand new Potterverse film. And Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them stars - you guessed it! - A Hufflepuff, in the form of dreamboat Eddie Redmayne. Things are looking up! You only have to watch Redmayne’s PSA to prove it. #HufflepuffPride Top Image Credit

#thisis2016, even if there have been a fair few times this year where it’s felt pretty 20th century. Between Trump, Brexit and Kanye deciding he wasn’t content with being called Yeezy/Yeezus (he also needed to be known as Pablo) it does seem like the only silver lining of 2016 was that we got a brand new Harry Potter movie - thanks, J.K. Rowling. So, do we need to run through the series of unfortunate events that has been this year? I didn’t think so - the past 11 months have been a circus. That is, a circus ending with a pretty alarming wake up call. It was a year slated for shattering the highest and hardest of all glass ceilings, for affirming the female voice and recognising the boundless capacity of women in roles where white-male power has been so ingrained. And yet, in America one man convicted of sexual assault walks free after serving three months of his sentence while another holds the title of president elect. A little closer to home, Teenage Magazine publishes a piece, victim blaming. We hear echoes of the old (troubling) refrain "she was asking for it". The glass ceiling remains intact, and misogyny is alive and well. It’s also been the year of Western countries shutting their borders as refugees pour out of war-torn regions, surging police brutalities, of the Singapore government mandating race-reserved elections to introduce a semblance of equality (read: tokenism). #thisis2016 was developed as a rally cry for Asian-Americans, a way for them to call out and share the day to day racism they experienced. And with the year we’ve had, there are a couple more things we need to stand against.

“She was asking for it”

Ah, the final frontier of victim blaming. An old classic. In a perfect world, a sexual assault victim would be met with empathy instead of doubt, but somehow people take it upon themselves to judge the nature of the victim to see whether their claim to sympathy is valid. Was there drinking involved? How short was her skirt? Did she obey the endless set of rules women have to follow in order to have their humanity respected? This mindset is harmful for so many reasons, not only because it protects the perpetrator but because it reinforces the victim’s feelings of guilt. Society does not need to climb aboard the victim’s guilt-trip train, because chances are, she’s already there. And she shouldn’t be - she did nothing wrong. No one “asks for it”.

“Facebook news = the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth”

We are living in the post-truth era. Remember that meme telling you to apply for that job you want but have no experience for because if Trump did it, so can you? Not only is zero experience required, but in our post-Trump world, it means you can flat out lie in your interview too. Facts no longer matter - it’s erratic, deliberately misinformed tweets and Facebook fake news chaos for us all now! Case in point: that meme that 11,000 Americans voted for Harambe? It’s a lie. Even though we don’t have to navigate bi-partisan social media echo chambers, it’s on us to fact check the things we read online.

“Political correctness has gone too far”

Language matters - it can be used to incite and isolate, as well as to affirm. We’ve seen how words served to sever a country pretty deeply divided to begin with - words that were passed off as locker room talk, words so racially charged (any bad hombres up in here?). It’s not so hard to reimagine them in a different context. Foreign trash. PRC scum. Or, in an accidental slip of the tongue. You don’t even look Indian. You’re so pretty… for a [insert race here]. Words matter. They matter a lot. They draw a line between ourselves and the “other”, oftentimes without us realising. We all have our prejudices, and we need to safeguard against them - starting with our words (and you know, actions too). #thisis2016 and there are only 30 days left to it. If we're to rescue ourselves from the shambles this year has become, we've got some work to do. Top Image Credit: Bowdoin Asian Students Association

When Starbucks starts rolling out their signature red cups, it’s official - the most wonderful time of the year has arrived. You know, the one where the capitalist giants of the world employ mythical figures to convince us to buy overpriced and probably unnecessary swag. And before you start calling me a grinch, I don’t mean Christmas. I’m talking about the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show (if my title wasn't a dead giveaway). Every year, the VS Executive Producer Ed Razek handpicks his angels and bestows the highest honour of strutting their barely-there stuff for the lingerie event of the season. It’s pomp and pageantry to the nth degree- think feathery showpieces, light-up “wings” and the million dollar Fantasy Bra. Needless to say you won’t find anything worn by the VS Angels at their Mandarin Gallery flagship store. Sure, the show is a bit of harmless fun. They’ve got a good concert going with Lady Gaga and The Weeknd slated to perform, plus it’ll be held in Paris for their 20th anniversary splurge (you guys, this show has been going for TWENTY YEARS?!). But for all the outrageous costumes, cheery model personas and celebrity performances, there is still one unifying factor - their out of this world bods. Maybe you are one of those people that can sit through the parade of bedazzled decolletage without wanting to dive headfirst into a pint of ice cream (I’m not). Or maybe you use this annual dose of legs for days as fuel for next year’s fitness goals. #NewYearNewMe, amiright? But before you sit down to plan your 2017 workout schedule, here are two things you have to know:

1. They work INSANELY hard to get those bodies

Insane in a please-do-not-put-your-body-through-this kind of way. Aside from putting in gruelling hours at the gym and subscribing to a clean eating routine that makes grabbing dinner with friends a real ordeal (spoiler: goodbye carbs, goodbye red wine), VS models do take things to the extreme. Example - Adriana Lima revealed she’d been on a liquid diet for over a week pre-show to shed weight.

2. Sometimes, it’s just in your DNA

And that’s a hard fact to swallow. Reality is a key element missing from the VSFS. From the ridiculously toned bodies on our television screens to the bikini clad images flooding our social media, it’s so easy to forget that these sort of figures are not the norm. By all means, use VS models as workout motivation but don’t make their bodies your absolute goal. And especially don’t try to emulate any of these bikini-body trends.

The Ab-Crack

Models like Bella Hadid and Emily Ratajkowski have been flaunting their ab cracks on Instagram like they got it from their mama… which, let’s be honest, they did. That shallow, defined ditch running down the center of their stomach is called the linea alba. And while you can train your abs and make them more pronounced, you can’t change their structure. That’s to say, it’s more than just working your core and having low body fat - you literally can’t split your abs if you weren’t born that way.

Thigh brows

Last year, the Kardashians truly being the gift that keeps on giving, gave us the “thigh brow”. It refers to the crease just under your hip bones that appears when you’re bent over or kneeling - apparently it indicates you’ve got booty. I say you should be doing your squats anyway, thigh brows or not.

Bikini Bridge

Another worrying trend that popped up in 2014 was the “bikini bridge”, where the space created between your bikini bottom, protruding hip bones and concave stomach when lying down was suddenly oh-so desirable. You could probably achieve this by buying bathers several sizes too big… but don’t.

Thigh Gap

All hail the thigh gap, the mother of all bikini trends. This myth has been debunked many times, but to do it once more won’t hurt. Once again, it comes down to bone structure. Getting that sliver of space between your inner thighs can be attributed to lean muscles, but it also has to do with the width of your hips and how your femoral heads are set. And there ain't nothing you can do about that. Having said all this, definitely do still watch the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show if you were planning to. It’s the perfect occasion to settle in with some ice cream, listen to Lady Gaga's latest album and cheer on the models - after all, each step they take is one step closer to being able to eat solid food again. <a href=" Image Credit