Recently, a popular local social media influencer came under scrutiny for her sponsored wedding. More specifically, for not being upfront about the sponsorships she got ranging from venue, food, and luxurious wedding favours to the 27 dresses made for her bridesmaids.
There were guests who reportedly felt ‘cheated’, as they felt that sponsorships “cheapened the wedding (and) made it insincere.” And should they have known that the wedding was heavily sponsored, they would have given a different amount in the Ang Baos.
Others reasoned that giving Ang Baos is “about celebrating with (the couple) and wishing them well,” and shouldn’t be co-related to wedding sponsorship.
This made us wonder: what is the meaning of a wedding and the act of giving Ang Baos then?
We reached out to 7 Singapore millennials to weigh in on this: how important is it to have lavish wedding banquets to millennials today? Also, are sponsorships an issue, and how critical is it to get a ‘big’ wedding Ang Bao. This is what they shared.
What Is A Wedding To You?
A big-ass party to end all parties. A day to signify the commitment between two people who will love each other even though they want to tear each other’s heads off and feed each other rat poison once in a while.
– Aaron, 33
An event to witness a covenant and sacred union between two people.
– Cai Ping, 27
It could be pride, to tell people that you’re taken, or to flaunt family wealth, but I think a wedding is a way to show off that you have ‘made it’ in life.
– Eugene, 26
Not just the celebration of the union of my partner and me, it’s also a way for me to thank my family and friends for being supportive of us and for seeing us to this stage of our lives.
– Samantha, 25
Big Weddings, Small Weddings, What Do You Want In Your Ideal Wedding?
It may be a once in a lifetime event but spending a lot doesn’t necessarily mean anything. You just have to make it special.
– Eugene, 26
It’s not very practical to hold such a big event for just a one day thing, unless I’m rich or am marrying into a rich family where fame and dignity plays a part.
I don’t need anything fancy. Ultimately, it’s the meaning behind the wedding that matters most – the marriage itself and the commitment to one another.
– Cai Ping, 27
It’s not important to have a lavish wedding at all. Too much money goes into these things which could be spent better – like on a gaming console.
I’d rather just invite my immediate family, relatives who actually matter, and my closest friends to a curry restaurant. And it’ll definitely be something affordable.
I know a guy who spent a shit ton of money for his wedding at a really famous hotel. Today his relationship with his wife is in ruins and he is in jail, going bankrupt while his mother is paying off his debts with her own retirement money.
– Aaron, 33
A wedding is too tiring for both the couple and their families, and so much money is spent on it too.
I’d rather have something small and affordable with just family and close friends. I’d spend more on travelling or honeymoon instead.
– Juanning, 23
Why Do YOU Give Wedding Ang Baos?
I give Ang Baos because of local customs and practices. But the more practical side would be to help the couple cover costs.
– Juanning, 23
I give it as a nice gesture because it’s the wedding of people important to me. As for the ones I don’t care about, I won’t even go.
But I think wedding Ang Baos are given out of tradition more than anything else today.
– Eugene, 26
I give them as a token of appreciation. Kind of like when you go to someone’s house for a party but instead of cookies or alcohol, the token comes in the form of cash.
– Aaron, 33
How Important Is Getting Big Wedding Ang Baos To You?
Expecting a big Ang Bao from guests to offset an expensive dinner that you chose to have is like inviting people to your housewarming and getting them to paint your house for you.
I want whoever who come to be there out of pure sincerity and not harbour a discontent of having to pay $88 (or more) just to watch me kiss my wife.
– Eugene, 26
It isn’t important at all. It should come from the heart and how much someone can afford to give.
– Kenny, 26
The Chinese believe that the bigger the Ang Bao, the bigger the blessing. But realistically, Ang Bao money is a financial help for newlyweds to ‘pay off’ the wedding and things like house renovations.
However, when I plan my wedding, I’m prepared to not break-even from the guests’ Ang Baos.
– Samantha, 25
Sponsored Weddings – Yes Or No?
Sponsorships are helpful for the couple in terms of finances and I believe that everyone would want to be sponsored if they are able to. So I don’t think there’s anything wrong.
– Yun Jie, 21
I get that people may see sponsorships as making a wedding seem inauthentic or insincere, but if it helps cut costs then I don’t see anything wrong.
Real weddings, fake weddings, they’re all weddings. The actual fake wedding is the one where you see them divorce a year later.
– Aaron, 33
I don’t see what the issue of having a sponsored wedding is. So many other celebrities and influencers have had sponsored weddings.
I think people are just sour about others getting sponsored weddings because most people give Ang Baos based on the ‘market price’ for that wedding location. And knowing that the couple isn’t paying for things, makes them feel like they paid more than they should.
– Juanning, 23
Sponsored or not, I think we should be genuinely happy for the couple and be honoured that they thought of us and want us to celebrate an occasion this important to them.
– Samantha, 25
What’s Your Say?
Many of us fall prey to the thought of The Dream Wedding. We pin dream wedding suits and dresses and add extensive ballroom decor into our wedding checklist. We send our partner photos of our friend’s wedding so they can ‘take note’.
Today, weddings have become such grand affairs, it seems as if not having an elaborate banquet affair is irreverent to the notion of a wedding.
With so much debate surrounding a long-standing tradition of marriages and weddings, how important is a wedding to you? Share your take with us in the comments!
Also read, 12 Things Singapore Couples Do That Singles Buay Tahan.