New year, but the same desperate scamper for a university placement. After securing your spot in school, there’s an even crazier fight for a room in the hall of your choice.
Staying in hall is the ultimate convenience, you are the closest you can possibly be to those dreaded morning lectures. In time to come, the late nights and endless fun with friends who literally live next door will become one of the highlights of your university life. But friends and fun aside, there’re a couple of infamous hall stories that may totally change your perspective of university halls – let’s just say that hall life is an eye-opening experience.
We spoke to friends who’ve stayed in hall and here are some promiscuous stories they shared. Stories that will make outsiders go ‘OMG’, but are nothing but common occurrence for fellow hall residents.
If you’re planning to stay in hall, brace yourselves!
1. Splashing Good Time
You would think that the deepest conversations happen in classrooms, or when someone gets drunk. For hall residents, some of their deepest and most meaningful conversations happen in their shared bathrooms.
Bathing used to be a private affair, until you live in hall, where the bathroom becomes a new social setting with it’s own set of unsaid rules.
Couples have also been known to ‘triple date’ in the men’s bathroom. Imagine this: girlfriend scrubbing her boyfriend’s back while he grumbles about the latest soccer match with his two bros in the cubicles just beside. Of course that’s as much physical intimacy that’s accepted in shared bathrooms. Don’t cross the line!
2. Lost and Never Found
Hang your clothes out often enough and someone might mistake your laundry line for a pasar malam store without a tenant – free clothes up for grabs!
During your stay at hall, you may notice a few of those tiny pieces of cloth you wear closest to your body go missing. Congratulations, you have attracted the attention of the residential panty thief. Keep calm and call the police, although few have been caught despite even though several reports have been made.
3. Budget Innovation
Instead of using the clothing line where your laundry is vulnerable to the unpredictable weather and an easy target for the residential panty thief, dryers are a better option. But at $1 per use, most broke university students wouldn’t use the dryer until they have accumulated a reasonable pile of laundry.
Thankfully, some hall ancestors have discovered a hack that costs nothing and dries your laundry faster. Meet the microwave. Not only is it good for heating up your late night snacks, they dry your clothes efficiently too! More importantly, it’s free.
But in all seriousness, drying your lingerie where people heat their food probably isn’t hygienic. Can you imagine taking out your freshly-microwaved underwear only to have it smelling like chicken rice?
4. Eye Sore
One of our friends shared a horrific experience where she witnessed her hall mate masturbating through the open window of his room. Another shared how he would always avoid looking out of his room windows because girls in the opposite block would change without drawing their curtains.
While everyone makes a conscious effort not to impose on someone else’s privacy, let’s not make it hard for other people! Let the poor dude look out his window for his 30 seconds eye break without worrying about being called a pervert. Catching a glimpse of someone naked by accident shouldn’t be a norm.
DRAW. YOUR. CURTAINS.
Needless to say, no one wants to deal with the awkwardness that ensues witnessing one of your friends naked, or having them see you naked accidentally. So unless you enjoy baring it all to anyone and everyone, close your curtains, draw your blinds, and shut the doors before you start stripping.
5. Door-to-Door Sales
Knock knock. Who’s there? Just your door-to-door salesperson selling herself by the hour.
According to some ex-hall students, those who live in residences with a higher population of foreign students often get offered sex at their door. As sad as it sounds, this is one of the limited ways foreign students can support themselves financially. Legally, they’re not allowed to work and it’s not easy finding consistent gigs that will pay cash under the table.
Wise Words
A word of advice from hall residents is to research on the hall’s ‘personality’ before you sign up. It’s weird how a building has a defined character, but check out their respective Facebook pages and you’ll discover the hall’s spunky personality and dominating trait – sporty, quiet, clubber siao, artsy fartsy, and more. You wouldn’t want to be trapped in a sporty hall when your head gets more ball action than your hands.
Here’s a tip for applicants with no inside connections: For halls that are more popular among freshmen, the committee tends to ignore applicants with a private Instagram account because they’re considered not ‘opened’ enough. While it is arguably unethical and not every hall has this practice, why risk it? Make your accounts public!
Also read, What It Means To Have A University Degree In 2016.