Whenever we reminisce our growing up days, flip phones, MSN, and Game Boys come to mind. Our coming of age was marked with tapered pants, folded skirts, and questionable hairstyles (long fringe and weird shades of blonde). We had all sorts of ways to entertaining ourselves and trying to be more 'adult' than we really were. One of the ways is through class chalets. It's funny how chalets were such an iconic part of our growing up years but we rarely talk about it today. Perhaps it's the staycation culture or maybe we just outgrew chalets, Regardless, chalets were once a big part in many millennials' teen life. Those colonial homes or little abodes at Downtown East were so quintessentially part of the “Singapore teenager” starter pack. It's where we would all gather and show off how close the class was by wearing class tees; that in hindsight were really ugly. It’s as if we actually liked being in uniform. After checking in, we'd flock to Escape Theme Park or Wild Wild Wet – always going on the same few rides again and again. In the evening, we would huddle around the BBQ pit and play games. The scouts or girl guides were normally tasked to start the fire and everyone else who volunteers to cook will be happily struggling not to burn the food.

Chalets were the best place for a big group of 40 that wanted nothing more than unadulterated fun; we didn't had to worry about curfews or how much noise we made in public. Above all, the biggest reason why chalets became such an integral part of my teenage years is because of what happens in the wee hours of the night.

You want beer?

I had my first beer at 14 years old, with classmates of the same age. Yes, we were absolutely too young. How then did this group of underage kids get beer? Like how all delinquents get their alcohol or nicotine at chalets: through an ah lian’s older boyfriend. No one at 14 appreciated the bitter taste of alcohol, but we each downed half a can anyway; probably from peer pressure and the desire to feel more mature than we really were. In fact, another class was also having their first taste of alcohol next door. They didn’t think anyone would find out since they disposed of the evidence discretely. Unbeknown to the class, one of their classmates went home wasted. When he vomited in his mother’s car, the cat was out of the bag and the principal found out.

It could have been the beer or the first taste of freedom but chalets were always a little wild; they were the unsupervised highlight of our growing up days. As oppressed students on most days of the week, we relished in being our own bosses for 2D1N. With no one to tell us how to dress, behave, or speak, we were at liberty to experiment with life and do as we pleased. It is where we popped our cherries on many things – first beer, first wasted night, first cigarette. For some, this is also where they first made love. Even when staycations outshone chalets, the latter somehow remained relevant in our lives.

Chalets Are The Perfect Excuse

When I turned 18 and went to my first club, I left the party at 2am because my parents insisted on picking me up. I wasn’t embarrassed but rather, upset for missing out. From then on, I would tell my parents I was staying over at a chalet if I ever wanted to spend the whole night out. And I'd get their approval - no questions asked. For some of my friends who are in forbidden relationships because of race, religion, or strict parents, chalets have proven to be the perfect cover for staying out late. Many staycations were only possible because of that excuse too. Could our teenage years be as exciting and thrilling as it’s supposed to be without chalets? I doubt so. Since they are considered safer and more acceptable than a club, a hotel room, or someone’s home even, chalets were and still is the perfect white lie. I’m sure teenagers these days have found their own way to dapple in these same vices, but I still can’t help but feel sad that the chalet culture is dying out. It’s almost like seeing a part of my childhood slowly disappearing. I’m aware that in chalets, <a href=" scandals and drug orgies thrived. But for me, it was simply a place where I had significant moments of prepubescent growth and new adventures. Unlike Tamagotchis and MSN, chalets were more than just a way to connect and have fun. It was where we learnt to define our own moral grounds and really grew up. (Header image credit: mkvlln voto) Also read, Glo-Up Or Fade-Out: 8 Millennials Share Their Life Experiences In The Past 10 Years

There was a time where I used to lament how I can never seem to gain weight, much to the envy (and annoyance) of my older friends and colleagues. 10 years later and the roles are reversed. At 27, I am now the one sighing at my 20-year-old friends or interns when they complain about feeling fat. Hello. Wait till you reach my age then you know. It’s funny how PE lessons were once something we look forward to as an enjoyable ‘break’ from classes back in school. Once you start working, the only physical activity you will willingly engage in is running to catch the bus. Once adulting gets real and work becomes life, it becomes harder and harder to stay in shape. Especially when you spend the 8 hours at work glued to a chair. The hustling will leave you so mentally drained that all you want to do after 6pm is laze at home and do nothing. There are so many other distractions more exciting than working out and finding the motivation to even hit the 10,000 steps a day challenge is a challenge as itself. As we grow older, it is only natural that our age and environment change us, be it for better or worse, through our shirt sizes or our mindsets. Curious to see what age, time, and work have done to other millennials, I reached out to 8 millennials. These is what 10 years have done to them and the wisdom they’ve gained in the decade.

1. Being Less Emotional And Laughing More

I grew up fat and got a lot of nicknames. It started with “Eugene Sohfat” in primary school, then “Hugene” in secondary school and “Tub of Lard” in polytechnic, and I used to feel insecure when I go to the beach cause my white tummy felt like a pile of forgotten yoghurt. Now I just laugh at it. I’m a lot more confident and generally less emotional about things now. I think the older you get the more well-shaped your perceptions and opinions are. I find myself being more truthful to strangers and people in general, and not having to worry so much about judgement too.  – Eugene, 27

2. Finding A Purpose In Life

I’m 30kg heavier with stretch marks as far as Jurong to Pasir Ris but instead of running away from it, I choose to embrace it. After I graduated, I starting to find things I could do. I switched many jobs and went from DJing to emceeing to influencer marketing and now, media and advertising. Besides my weight, I’d say the main difference is having found a purpose in life, and that’s more than enough.  – Dew, 26

3. Confidence Opened Many Doors

I used to avoid a lot of physical activities because I felt like everyone was scrutinising my thighs and arms if I wear sportswear or swimwear. I don't think anyone really notices about these things but I can’t help thinking that they're judging me for being fat. When I was around 18, I would work out almost every day and eventually lost 10kg. It was a painful process, but I'm glad that it happened. Although I’m not as fat as I was previously, I still feel it (body insecurity) and am very afraid of putting on any weight, but I am definitely more confident than before. I can definitely see myself ageing (skin not as bright or taut and crown of hair not as thick) at my current age too. But that's just part of life. More importantly, I found ways to deal with my skin problems and became bolder in experimenting with style, eventually finding the type of 'look' that suit me best. All these adds up and really changed the way I carried myself. People always say that it's the inside that should count but you can't deny that a good hair day or a nice outfit makes you feel better about yourself. And when you do, you're braver to try new stuff or engage yourself with people you've always felt intimidated by. And this has opened doors for me in many ways.  – Mel, 28

4. Denying Insecurity From Power

I was teased in secondary school for having a ‘baby moustache’ and was very concerned about my physical appearance. My forehead acne and blackheads bothered me too and it made me feel very insecure about my own body. I didn't really know how to deal with all that back then it got worse when puberty started and hair started growing at my arm pits. I even cried every other day. To make myself feel better, I did things that would make myself look more womanly, like drawing my brows or wearing heels. Even though I am still not completely satisfied with my looks despite knowing how to manage my skin, I've learnt to be contented with what I have. My confidence could be a mash up of maturity and laziness, or it could also be that I simply care more about what I think about myself than what other people think about me. I do worry and do try to prove myself to people still but I don't give these insecurities as much attention or as much power over me as it used to. When I was younger, everything felt like the end of the world because of how unexposed I was. In hindsight, a lot of my worries weren't that big of a deal. That's how I take life nowadays: I try my best but if I suck or if I fail, it isn't that big of a deal.  – Isabel, 21

5. Handling Situations With More Maturity

I was picked on by seniors in secondary school because of my small frame. They would cut my queue during recess or do other mean things. Besides that, being physically unfit meant passing NAFA was a chore. I started bulking up. And I started keeping facial hair as it makes me look fierce. It’s a good deterrence when I want to do my own things without people disturbing me, like when I'm trying to avoid an insurance agent waiting at the foot of an escalator. But partially also because I got too busy and lazy to shave during submission period in university. If I can go back in time, I’d punch the younger me for being a little wuss. I’ve learnt to be tougher, more disciplined, and more focused on what I want to achieve in life. Religion and supportive friends helped, but it was all the experiences I’ve gone through that made me more able to handle situations more maturely now.  – Janielson, 26

6. Your Thoughts Are Your Choice

My high metabolism makes it really hard for me to gain weight since young and I’d always look skinny and fragile. People would point out how skinny I am whenever I wore shorts and that made me feel even more self-conscious, which affected the way I behaved. I was very shy and would hide my true self in social situations because I didn’t want people to think bad about me. I eventually met people whom made me feel comfortable being my authentic, quirky and playful self. It’s your choice whether you want to accept people’s comments and learn from them or carry those negative thoughts with you. I choose to look at the positive side of things.  – Raymond, 21

7. No Need For Constant Affirmation

People often teased me and called me “blackie” because I played hockey a lot and got really tanned. It didn’t help that my fair-skinned cousins made me feel like I'm the odd one out. I never liked to smile with my teeth because I didn’t have very straight teeth. My eyebags were a problem too because people often asked me why I haven't been sleeping when I've had more than enough sleep. And in a time when a lot of us were going through puberty, trying to accept ourselves, and where it was all about fitting in with friends, I felt the constant need to change myself to please others. I was affected by the things people say about me because I didn't want to be an outcast. I’m a lot less tanned now, thankfully, and I grew taller, but I grew bigger sideways too. But now, I have other priorities and don't see the constant need to please others. The insecurities will probably always be there but I’ve learnt to accept and deal with it and not let it affect me as much. Instead of criticising myself and changing myself just so I could fit in to the norms of this materialistic world, I realised that true friends will stay and accept me for who I am and that eventually taught me to love and value myself more.  – Candice, 23

8. Turning Weaknesses Into Opportunities

I had the whole inferiority complex where every little bit of me didn't seem good enough in my own eyes and I didn’t know how to navigate that. For example, I would feel inferior wearing glasses and felt the need to wear contacts so that I look better. And because I was always afraid of wearing contacts, I just didn't bother turning up for social gatherings at all. I am definitely more confident now and care less about what others think of me. It's a much easier life to live. I'd still wear contacts when I want to impress girls or on dates but it's more about boosting my self-confidence than finding a way to feel 'sufficient'. I have other insecurities like having white hair, but I see it as an opportunity to just play with my hair: toss in different colours to make the most out of a perceived weakness. So, it’s a matter of loving yourself and embracing every little bit of your ‘flaws’.  – Andrew, 26

Make The Best Of Change

Growing old is inevitable and the stresses of a job and age will catch up on you but what matters is what you make of it. Today, I avoid body-fitting clothes altogether for fear of looking like Michelin Man. Those clothes are packed into an obscure corner of my wardrobe – testament of the 15KG I’ve gained and the denial in which I will never fit into those tiny pieces of cloth anymore. But like most millennials I spoke to, my personal and emotional growth outweighs the 15KG I’ve gained and are changes I’m proud of. The collective lessons from the experiences through the years gave me invaluable takeaways and formed the mature, confident, and happy-go-lucky personality that is me today. Do you have insecurities growing up? Don’t be being bogged down by them. Embrace them and find your confidence instead! Also read, Then & Now: Photos Of 9 Longtime Singapore Couples That Prove True Love Still Exists.

When we were kids, we were like a sponge soaking up everything we hear and see. We copied what our parents said and pretended to be our favourite cartoon characters. Above all, we were cheeky little buggers who’d get ourselves into facepalm-worthy incidents. We asked Singapore millennials about the ‘stupid’ things they had done when they were primary school kids or younger. Here are 10 of the funniest incidents.

Shaver As Comb

I remember playing Pretend with my cousins and we were using a real shaver as a comb. I used the shaver to comb my hair then freaked out when I saw my hair falling off. – Anmol, 24

Playing With Fire

I was playing with fire and candles with some friends during mid-autumn festival. One of them started swiping their finger across the candle flame and before you know it, all of us were doing it because it was cool to us, kids. I wanted to be cooler, so after doing the same a few times, I tried to hold my finger in the flame longer. I got burnt. – Betty, 26

A Sticky Situation

I got bubble gum stuck in my hair because I wanted to see if I could ‘balance’ the gum on my head. It got stuck so badly and became a badly tangled lump of hair. My mum had to rub it off bit by bit with olive oil. – Bling, 26

A Tic Tac Addiction

I was so addicted to Tic Tacs and the sound from shaking it that when I finished the candy, I put in a five cent coin so I could continue shaking the box. When I shook it, I tilted the box above my head and ended up swallowing the five cent coin and had to go to the hospital. – Sammie, 25

Brow Game

My primary five classmate shaved his eyebrows off to prove that eyebrows served no purpose. He looked ridiculous after that. He kept quiet when everyone started poking fun at him. Poor boy. – Shi Ling, 26

Pet Rock

My friend and I picked out a random rock at the garden near our place and kept it as our pet rock. We even gave it a name and brought it with us everywhere in school. One day, we hid the rock in some part of the garden and we couldn’t find it when we went back the next day. We felt so sad after that, it was as if we really lost a real pet. – Marie, 23

Pretending To Be Wrestlers

The boys watched a lot of WWE back then. Once, I went to a friend’s house and a group of us were trying out some wrestling moves. I tried to mimic the wrestlers and jumped down from the top of a ladder and broke my arm. That was the first and last of our ‘wrestling session’. – Neo, 30

Raining Barbie Heads

My sister and I had a lot of Barbie dolls. At one point, I realised that I could pull the dolls’ heads off and fix it back so I started removing the heads quite often. We have this small window at the top of the toilet facing the shower area and once when my sister was bathing, I threw in the dolls’ heads through that window, for fun. She freaked out. – Jennifer, 21

Marksman

I was staying on the 9^th floor and whenever I see kids playing at the playground downstairs, I'd take my water gun and shoot water at them from my window. And when their parents come up, I’d close all the doors and pretend no one was home. – Fabian, 24

Exploding Shit

I spent my childhood in Philippines and it was around New Year so my friends and I were playing with fire crackers. We stuck a fire cracker in a pile of dog shit and lit it up. The firecracker exploded along with the shit. It went all over the road and the cars around. We saw the car owners horrified as they came out to check their shit-stained cars but they never found out it was us. – Raymond, 20

Were You A Cheeky Child Too?

Childhood has got to be the best years of our lives. When else can you do and say darndest things like these and get away with it? And if you’re looking for someone to share all your embarrassing childhood tales with, try here. We’re pretty sure these have brought back some childhood memories of yours too. What are some of the stupidest things you’ve done as a kid? Share them with us in the comments! Also read, Meet 14-Year-Old Riddhi And Her 77-Year-Old Best Friend, Aunt Louise.

"I don't know how to act my age. I've never been this age before." People say you’re supposed to be an adult at age 18, 21, 24. People say a lot of things, but as you check each of those birthdays off the calendar, thinking the next one will be the one, you start to wonder: Am I ever going to feel like an adult? When you were a child or teenager, the “adult” was a concept of something that you were not. Like, “I don’t know what the hell it means to be an adult, but I sure as hell know I’m not one, so yeah! Take that, old people!” You didn’t know exactly what it meant to be an adult, but you knew you weren’t one for sure. I mean, how could you be, right? But as you got older, it became harder and harder to convince yourself that you weren’t an adult, and you started to wonder why you hadn’t hit that stride that would carry you into being a proper adult like your parents. I think the truth is that you never will. None of us actually ‘become’ adults, we just kind of… are. Growing up is a process of learning many different new things, and letting go of many of the things that defined our younger selves. For some of us, we might have let go of our crazy, impossible dreams, like the dream teenage me had of being a rock star. Or, we let go of the all-consuming desire to be liked and popular. Being an adult is not just about learning how to pay your taxes and make money at your job and gamble with stocks; it’s also about unlearning things from your younger days, for better or worse. For every bad habit we let go of as we mature, we often let go of good character traits as well, and learn terrible things from the people who call themselves adults. We learn to be judgemental, to discriminate. We learn the difficult truths that selfishness is the law of the land, and that there is no such thing as good or bad, right or wrong. Adulthood is about learning, first and foremost. But since we learn throughout our lives, the process of becoming an adult is really an ongoing one. In that sense, if we grow into adults, then the ‘adult’ is really just a perfect version of ourselves that we can never be, like a dog chasing its own tail. For what it’s worth, though, here are a few lessons I’ve learnt that have helped me in some little way in my clueless fumble through adulthood. Maybe they’ll help you too. Well, probably not, but who knows right?

To Be Happy Is to not give a f*ck

In ‘simpler’ times, all people had to care about was food, water, shelter, and sex. That was it. Get fed, get hydrated, find a cave, get laid. Now, we have a laundry list of stupid little things, including laundry, to attend to, and it’s frankly exhausting af. Is it better than living in the jungle and worrying about getting mauled by tigers? Probably. But it’s still exhausting af. People use the term ‘carefree’ as if it’s something they want, something they aspire to, but they do absolutely nothing to achieve it. Too many people care way too much about way too many things, and in doing so neglect the truly important things in life. Trim the fat. Pick your battles. Stop caring about things that are not important.

Other people’s opinions of you are none of your business

Speaking of not giving a f*ck, one of the stupidest things to give a f*ck about is the opinion someone else has of you. Especially stupid is when you care about the opinions of people you don’t even know. That is the kind of nonsense high schoolers worry themselves with. So, f*ck those people staring at you on the train. F*ck superficial acquaintances who think they know everything about you because they’re such great judges of character. F*ck the things people say about you but are too spineless to say to you. They don’t matter. And your opinions of others shouldn’t matter to them either.

Everyone thinks they’re the good guy

In the process of becoming an adult, you realize that the ‘good guys’ – sold to you by the media as kids – don’t actually exist. Right or wrong is all a matter of perception. There is no such thing as an objectively ‘good’ or ‘bad’ person, only a person who is good or bad for you. When you learn this, you stop chasing someone else’s ideals of what it means to be good, and start focusing on your own version of being a good person. You understand that the righteous hate you have for others is all bullshit, and you become more understanding of the differences between people. You learn that there is often no point in trying to convince someone to see things from your point of view, and to instead live in a state of mindful acceptance with the world around you.   Growing up sucks, let's be honest. But maybe next time you feel lost and confused about adulting, you can take some solace in the knowledge that everyone else is just as f*cking clueless as you are. Top Image Credit